Vol 4 Chapter 48

The sight of him staring with slightly bloodshot eyes, displaying unconditional hostility and sharp reactions before gritting his teeth and shrinking back was utterly unfamiliar. Though he seemed almost intoxicated as he couldn't take his eyes off Mu-heon, there wasn't much smell of alcohol in the house. Intense anxiety was palpable in his gaze. He clearly couldn't properly control his emotions.

Just as Mu-heon himself had been in the past.

While his past self probably wouldn't have understood this behavior at all, after the incident where Kran had saved him and died in his place, a vague thought had emerged in his mind.

That moment of the accident that had remained painted black. If he switched the positions of the savior and the saved, how would he have felt? As he looked at Seung-jo while recalling that thought again, what he couldn't answer then suddenly lit up brightly.

He had never once thought about everything Seung-jo must have felt after he pushed him away. Because saving Seung-jo had been such a natural action for him that it felt like instinct, even in that moment of intense emotion.

Kran had also cast Holy Transfer on him without saying anything, as if it were natural, and was pierced instead by the sword that had thrust in unexpectedly. That was when he first felt that being saved through someone else's sacrifice didn't leave the saved person unaffected.

Although Kran seemed to have buried that incident as if it were nothing afterward, Mu-heon still felt his chest tighten whenever he recalled it, along with feelings similar to guilt and anger. These included resentment towards Kran for acting on his own and self-hatred towards his own stupidity.

'Anger... anger...'

Then what about Seung-jo?

His gaze, staring without the slightest wavering despite his body's trembling. None of this had been created in a single moment. Just as Mu-heon had changed, he too had changed like this. The moment he reached that thought, a heavy impact hit his chest.

He looked at Seung-jo, who also couldn't speak, while emotionlessly steadying his trembling eyelids. Without taking any action, when he came to his senses, he noticed that both he and Seung-jo were breathing much more heavily than usual. The sound of their panting breaths was enough to make his head feel hot.

He had come saying they both needed to meet to live, but in the end, they were both breathing desperately as if each other's presence was deadly poison. Strangely feeling as if something deep in his chest had been defenseless pierced, he moved his lips with difficulty.

"I too... it seems it was arrogant to think I could talk with you right now."

"..."

"Today... it would be better... if I leave now."

Until Mu-heon staggered and turned around, muttering quietly that they should meet again after organizing their thoughts more, Seung-jo sat there like a statue. Though it had been just a brief encounter, feeling his mind and body as tired as if he had exercised for hours, how many steps had he taken fumbling towards the front door in the darkness?

Suddenly his shoulder was roughly grabbed and turned, causing him to lose balance and fall backward. Immediately there was a loud thud along with irregular pain from objects scattered on the floor. While he was momentarily dazed, unable to gather his thoughts due to the strong impact to his head and shoulders, he felt large hands that had fallen with him pressing down on both his arms with all their might, completely crushing him.

'What... is this.'

As he painfully rolled his eyes while feeling extreme nausea, he met directly with two explosively intense eyes.

"Where do you think you're going?"

"What are you doing..."

As he only muttered his own words, unable to properly understand the question through the buzzing noise, his collar was grabbed and his face was pulled up close.

"No. You may have come in as you pleased, but if you thought you could leave as you pleased too, you're mistaken... understand?"

"Cough, ugh... Get off!"

While coughing from being unable to breathe, he kicked up at Seung-jo's abdomen with his good left foot, trying to push away the man who still seemed to be only moving his mouth with a loud buzzing. With a grunt, Seung-jo's strength weakened slightly. Taking advantage of that gap, Mu-heon tried to roll to the side and get up, but he slipped and fell face-first after accidentally touching what felt like a bottle in the darkness.

"Urgh!"

Even as he tried to get up by pressing against the floor while enduring the pain in his chin and arms, his unresponsive right leg felt frustratingly heavy.

'Damn it!'

Just as he was trying to find the wall by feeling around while only half-raising his upper body in an awkward position, suddenly a strong hand firmly grabbed his left ankle and pulled, making him fall and be dragged again.

"Ugh..."

Despite trying his best to hold back his groans and pain by gritting his teeth, a black shadow climbed onto his legs, making his efforts meaningless.

"Jeong Seung-jo...!"

When he shouted while grimacing at the feeling of being unable to properly open his eyes, Seung-jo roughly grabbed and pressed down on his neck with one hand.

'Damn it!'

Just like animals, when humans have their escape route blocked and vital points pressed, their chances of escape become infinitely slim. Though he clenched his fist waiting for an opportunity, he inevitably ran out of breath. The moment he opened his mouth gasping for oxygen, a voice that seemed to have just risen from hell rang in his ear.

"You should never have tried to see me."

A rough breathing sound scraping through the throat.

"I always... tried to endure until the end... but the one who kept chasing..."

Was you.

A crying-like laugh flowed from Seung-jo. At the same time, his neck was pressed even harder as the body on top of him overlapped with his. Though he struck mercilessly at the side of his ribs, Seung-jo showed no reaction, like a beast staring at its crushed prey.

"Everything had already ended then... but you're the one who came looking first."

When he struggled to remove the hand pressing his neck, this time his wrists were grabbed.

"Huk..."

A metallic sound suddenly escaped from his freed throat. As his whole body lost strength due to his breathing being blocked to the limit then released, while his gaze wandered, Seung-jo's other hand came up to his roughly breathing cheek. Hot fingertips brushed his face.

"Whenever I saw you, I felt hatred and pain... I wished you had died instead. Is this the kind of story you came to hear? Well, Kang Mu-heon?"

Though his body stiffened from the shock for a moment, he didn't want to show his agitation. When he glared straight back, the smile on Seung-jo's lips grew wider, showing his teeth.

"You've lost a lot of weight since I last saw you. Your face now... looks like an adult's."

"What are you..."

The moment he barely squeezed out his heavily hoarse voice, he felt a tearing pain between his neck and shoulder. It was because Seung-jo had lowered his head and bit that area. Before he could even groan from the pain, a hand that had roughly traced down his chest, ribs, and stomach area crept inside his pants and clothes.

In a state where he couldn't even understand what was happening, something touching his bare skin was enough to make his mind shut down all other instincts except the thought of survival. It felt like that thing creeping in, scratching his bare skin, might stab him at any moment. That's how terrible Seung-jo's killing intent was.

"Urrrgh!"

The moment his body stiffened from the creepiness, Seung-jo raised his head and opened his blood-stained lips with the most dazed look and strange expression since their reunion.

"...But why, even though everything has changed so much, why are you alone, Kang Mu-heon, still..."

'Now...!'

Thwack!

Twisting his wrist free with all his might, he struck Seung-jo's temple as hard as he could, then mercilessly kneed him in the solar plexus while flipping over. Seung-jo didn't stay still either, reaching out with claw-like hands trying to grab him again. After fighting for a while in intense silence where not even shouts escaped, when he struck Seung-jo's back with something he had frantically felt around for on the floor, there was a sound of something sharp breaking.

Without time to check what it was, Mu-heon escaped by practically crawling with all his might and barely managed to stand up using the wall for support. As he ran down the stairs after opening the unlocked front door, almost falling, the feeling of his leg dragging along drove him nearly mad.

After sliding down several more times while leaning on the railing, he saw a woman trying to get into an elevator that hadn't quite closed yet, looking at him with strange eyes. Without a second thought, he jumped inside and repeatedly pressed the close button.

Though he reached the first floor, he didn't know where to go. Panting and looking around frantically with a feeling of being chased, he limped and ran onto the road right in front of him.

Screech! Honk! Honk!

Though the surroundings became noisy, he couldn't feel anything. He saw a taxi among the cars that had come to a sudden stop and approached to knock on the door. Only after frantically getting in did he realize it wasn't an unmanned taxi but one with a driver. Though the driver said something with a scared-looking face, all that came from Mu-heon's mouth was a single muttering of his home address.

His face reflected in the rearview mirror had no expression, as if he were dead. When he suddenly felt an itch on the side of his head and raised his arm to wipe it, a long smear of sticky blood came away. Seeing the blood suddenly made him dizzy.

"What on earth happened... blood... should I call 119..."

The taxi driver's voice, continuing to say something, turned into a buzzing sound. His vision blurred and he couldn't see anything. His consciousness faded away just like that.